Wednesday, 5 August 2009


I don't think there's much denying it anymore. Beside all of it's good little bits, like Poker and the other games you can play, Facebook is fast becoming the Oracle of the modern world. Facebook finds out about engagements before the majority of people's families. Facebook has also replaced the calendar as a way of remembering birthdays.

It is quite funny, and I don't participate in this part of Facebook very heavily myself, but before, or immediately preceding, anything that you may or may not do, a status change is always in order! You're off to bed. You're looking forward to tonight's night out. You feel a bit pissed off. For example...

Joey Burns is going to get in the bath.

Straight after this, people will like it. Or comment it, about how you should approach this bath notion, and what consequences it may have on your life. It's like an online conscience! Funny enough, a status update about getting in the bath can then lead up to a large conversation about what you've been up to that day, etc. Which has also been outlined in a previous status update about possibly eating a biscuit.

There's then the guilty pictures of a dirty night on the piss that you post up the next day. It's ritual for most now, this process. Your online conscience then views these pictures, tagging itself in the photos relentlessly. These tags are then links to other people seeing your stuff, which then leads to someone you were in a lift with back in the 80's adding you.

I do also genuinely feel that Facebook is very much a part of breaking up with someone these days. There's not just the Relationship Status that needs changing from In a Relationship to Single, or even It's Complicated! You then need to go through the friends that you've added as a result of this relationship in a view to blocking off any way of the ex clocking what you've been up to. Because this is literally the sole purpose of Facebook.

It's like Friends Reunited crossed with Big Brother. People want to see what you've been up to, every single second of the day. The success of Blackberrys and iPhones speaks volumes, as people want to be on top of the goss every single second of the day. You see people turkeying for their Facebook fix.

It seems that it was invented as a way for people to keep in touch with each other, but it seems to have snowballed into a bitchy gossip site where people are often bullied.

And Joey Burns doesn't likes this.

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